I am officially home for summer, it has been a long one already, and I am only 4 days in!
There have been some updates with my moms health over the past few weeks.
She has been doing a round of chemo every week since January. The last scans showed some breaking up and shrinkage in her liver and lungs, but also new spots are popping up in her liver. The doctors have pushed her 3 month scans up to a little less than 2 months, just to see if there has been any growth and if we need to switch the level of chemo.
Things are starting to get a little too real for my liking also.
My moms hair as almost all fallen out, and she has found a nice wig to wear that looks completely real. Along with her hair falling out (which happened as couple months ago), her nails have started to bruise and bleed underneath, making it hard for her to do much with her hands without them bleeding.
My grandfather (so my moms dad) has been talking to me a lot about how his mother also died from this type of breast cancer when he was in high school. Yesterday, he mentioned that his dad also got remarried a while after his mom died, and then proceeded to warn me that that could happen to us as well.
On the first full day I was home from school (Thursday), I went with her to her chemo treatment.
The cancer center is a sad place.
They try to make it brightly colored and bring in dogs, music, and other visitors to keep the spirits up, but underneath it all, there is just this deep sadness in everyone.
Lately I have also been feeling very selfish. I know many friends that are spending their summers away overseas, studying abroad, and living in new places. I don’t get the luxury of leaving with nothing to worry about. It’s very selfish of me, I know.
All in all, things are unraveling a little quicker than expected.