The past few days have hit me like a train if I am being honest.
After the excitement of seeing my friends and getting back into the swing of things wore off, I am back to square one.
Wine is so good, but also something that brings out a good amount of emotions. I only had two glasses last night, and was no where close to even feeling any sort of tipsy. But as I was standing in a crowded room full of sweaty drunk college students, I was suddenly over it. Next weekend might be different and I might totally be ok with the drinking and partying, but this weekend I felt the weight of the break, and my family back home struggling, swallow me.
Every time I talk to one of my parents on the phone they always put on a good voice and try to assure me that everything is fine. And maybe it is, but I want to be home. I am afraid I am missing something, out of the loop.
I miss being the strong one for my family. I feel like at home I can be confronted by all of it and I can stay stone faced and dry eyed. But here, when I’m taking a step back from it all, it’s harder than I thought.
I love college, but I am missing my family more than ever before.